I think it's time for the people in charge of manufacturing and distributing crack to consider a rebranding campaign. The first thing they need to do is get rid of that stupid name. Crack is the only major drug that doesn't have a cool euphoric name which is why they should start calling it "crackers" instead. Everybody loves delicious crackers and crackers do a lot of crack, so it's a no-brainer. After that they should do a national "We Will Crack Rock You" commercial campaign where celebrities bang their crack spoons on a table to the beat of the classic Queen song. If the people in charge of crack do these things, "crackers" should replace cigarettes as America's most popular drug by the end of the century.



















































