Most meteoroligists believe that tornadoes are simply the result of Mother Nature's menstrual cycle spinning out of control. When it rains it means Mother Nature just found out a supernatural being from another universe has cheated on her and when it hails it means she has dandruff. They're still not sure what causes earthquakes, but they think it's possible that Mother Nature is morbidly obese and they occur when the guy lets her be on top.